My son, Joseph Malik Fannell, 22, was killed by a driver who ran a red light. This blog was created to chronicle the emotions and stages of my grief following his death.
Grief is a state of being. It never ends. We never get over it or through it. We just find ways to endure.
"If your heart is broken, you'll find God right there; if you're kicked in the gut, He will help you catch your breathe." Psalm 34:18
In the shadow of your grief, remember to breathe.
Monday, September 25, 2017
And I can hear the birds chirping as the hatchlings eagerly wait
to be fed, and the parents scour the grounds for worms.
I hear the whispers and laughter in the distance as children on
their way to school stand at the bus stop.
And I hear the voices of the teens that walk there.
Toddlers are whisked away in their strollers and by hand, on
their morning walks with the grands, as I hear their playful conversations.
Other little ones ride by in excitement and wonder on scooters
and tricycles, as I hear “stay on the sidewalk.”
Neighbors go about morning activities, as I hear the wrestle
with trash cans and lawn mowers.
And I hear some chatting as they gather at the mailboxes, to
collect mail from the day before.
Cars whiz by as their drivers make their way to work, or run
their morning errands, as I hear the music in the background. Joyfully.
And the sound of dogs, big ones and little ones, vying for
position startle me with their barks.
There is activity all around me.
But inside, inside there is silence.
The house so still I can hear the softness of my scarf as it
falls from my hair on the hardwood floor.
The house so quiet, my thoughts are awakened by the sound of its
And the reality settles in once again.
And you are not here.
And although it takes everything in my being, to get up,
Because it’s morning.
And I must go on.
In the shadow of my grief….
Sis. E and Joseph’s mom
Copyright 2017 www.intheshadowofgrief.com
Joseph Malik Fannell January 14, 1993 – June 5, 2015